I. Fleecem

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Release the hounds...

Name: I. Fleecem
Appears In: Zelda: Wand of Gamelon
Sex: Male
DOB: 1879 (age 141–142)
Nationality: Canadian
Occupation(s): Shopkeeper, pedophile

A shopkeeper you can surely trust.

I. Fleecem is the immortal shopkeeper of Gamelon. He is biggest enemy of Morshu, the shopkeeper of Koridai. He makes a cameo appearance in Zelda: The Wand of Gamelon. It is also rumored that I. Fleecem and I.M. Meen are distant cousins.

He didn't receive a name in the games or the Enclosed Instruction Book, unlike Morshu, which only increased the rivalry between the two. His shop, however, was named the General Store (and Morshu has to settle for "Morshu's shop"). He is sometimes given the nickname Ushrom, and under this name appeared alongside Morshu on Youchew Trading Card #87.

Card description:

"Ushrom, who of course in on your side, serves the role of salesman in Zelda: Wand of Gamelon. Pick whatever you want, he'll handle the boo...rupees. Thin and differing in color scheme, he's generally considered the lesser of the two."

Origins

Fleecem was born in 1882 to a family of bicycle sellers. Since they lived in a far-off country with a different culture and far less intelligence, Fleecem went to preschool at the age of 65. While there, he met Eugene Krabs, but he was only five back then. When he went to university at an old age, there, he met a student named Morshu.

The War

His war with Morshu started when they had the same idea: a shop with lamp oil, rope and bombs. So they made two shops that were just conveniently across the street from each other, in order to see which shop got more customers. Sadly Morshu won the war, thanks to being nicer to small children and young women, but this didn't stop Fleecem. Fleecem set up a Pet/Artillery Shop in Gamelon, which sold swords, maps, Octoroks, Dodongos, Tektites, and creepy-looking masks. Too bad his only customers were Link, Gwonam and Ganondorf, but who cares. At least he got customers, ha.

Nowadays

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Fleeceman taking part in the ritual summoning of Tom Nook, which is common among Gamelonian shopkeeps.

Greedy for money, I. Fleecem travels around the world searching for the One Piece great fortune surpassing Morshu's. Unfortunately, it's unlikely he'll ever succeed, considering that he's a pervert and he's not really popular in Youtube Poop. Too bad for him.

Quotes

  • "Just pick what you want..I'll handle the rubies!"
  • "Boobies!"