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Ophelia Chill

From Chewiki: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
CharNice.jpg This article is filed under Characters.

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Welcome to her home. But once you enter, you can never escape.

Name: Ophelia Chill
Appears In: Chill Manor
Sex: Female
Age: 72
Nationality: American
Occupation(s): Librarian / Evil Bitch / Sorceress
Played By: Chloe Leamon

{{#ev:youtube|oYGgLZL2vUU|320}}What a nice dearie she is.
{{#ev:youtube|v4wpmeIIy0A|320}}...Okay, maybe she isn't nice.
{{#ev:youtube|JNqOO0cMldY|320}}Guess who's back? Back again?

"I'm so very glad to see you. You're most welcome in my home. Won't you skip into my parlor? In these halls, you're free to roam!" - Ophelia Chill as you enter her Chewiki article.

Ophelia Chill is a bitch who somehow ended up being a librarian. (Just like someone else that we know of.) However, unlike that same son of a bitch that we told you of before, she's actually glad to see you around these parts. In fact, the only child she hates seeing around her home is Agent Egghead.


Like we mentioned before, Ophelia is a librarian. However, she's probably more liked to children despite being the second-most hated librarian around these parts. The reason is because she loves inviting children into her home. But one day, she got bored of what history has to show for this world. As a result, she decided to grab a special book called "The Book of Ages". Some say that it is actually the most powerful book of them all. And when we say that, we definately mean more powerful than The Book Trilogy combined. Others say that that was the missing name for the third book that a certain old man owns. (Or should we say, used to own?) Anyway, the magic of this book allows her to rip off pages and change them, which causes history to be in complete chaos. She then would hold the power to a dictator of the entire world if she wanted to. Hell, she could even erase your own name from that book if she wanted to. Because she's such a senile bitch, she decided to let Agent Egghead try to crack her case and make sure history stays as it is. Oh, and she got married to I.M. Meen. How lovely...yet creepy.


  • I.M. Meen
  • The Book of Ages
  • Singing
  • Having children enter her house.
  • Magic
  • Erasing your name from history.
  • Laughing like a witch.
  • Acting like an immature child.
  • Shaking her old ass.
  • Making crowns of kings turn into monstrous Jester's hats.
  • The magic labyrinth of I.M. Meen
  • Peeing on her dear Ignatius



  • "I'm so very glad to see you. You're most welcome in my home. Won't you skip into my parlor? In these halls, you're free to roam!"
  • "I've been waiting for you, dearie, and I've got a big surprise! Watch me change the course of history before your very eyes!"
  • "Eeh-Hee-Hee-Hee-Hee-Hee-Hee-Hee!"
  • "You see, I stole the Book of Ages and I tore out all the pages! Now I'm making little changes on each one!"
  • "I've hide them here in every hall. I highly doubt you'll find them all!"
  • "My nasties will distract you until I'm done! Eeh-Hee-Hee-Hee!"
  • "Changing history is lots of fun! Ah-Heh-Heh-Heh!"
  • "Wha-Yoooooooooou!! You won't get away with this, Agent Egghead!"
  • "My dear Ignatius! I knew you'd shave me!"
  • "My dear Ignatius! I knew you'd save me!"
  • "Nice try, Agent Egghead, but it looks like my minions got the better of you."
  • "You've meddled in my affairs long enough."
  • "I'm erasing you from history once and for all! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH!!!"


  • Her sworn rival is some childish bastard named "Agent Egghead". It's said that Egghead works for Wizardheimer.
  • She's married to the eviliest librarian around: I.M. Meen.
  • Ophelia knew that I.M. Meen would shave her.
  • It's said that she rules over the Halls of Illusions.
  • She may want you to chill out, but she doesn't know how to do that herself.
  • Ophelia is also the owner of many more books than she knows what to do with them.
  • That son of a bitch is going to be more popular in YouTube Poops now. We guarantee you that.
  • Her first name is a bitch to spell on a keyboard.