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User:NextG/NextG's Big Show What a Thrill Congratulations!

From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas

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NextG's Big Show What a Thrill Congratulations! is a 24-minute poop created by NextG. Due to the length of the poop, it was split into three parts, uploaded on July 20, 23, and 27, 2007.

Contents[edit]

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Title screen.

The poop is one of few to feature opening credits, spoofing the titles of the film Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory with several interruptions during the credits. There is a mention to the National Association of YouTube Video Hackers over one of these scenes, as the credits are eventually restored and end as normal.

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"This is called a rab suoitpmuylidimurcs."

From there, further spoofing of Willy Wonka continues, as the film enters the initial candy shop sequence. When asked what Wonka's new candy is, Bill, the candy shop owner, describes it as a "rab suoitpmuylidimurcs." A curious boy asks how Wonka does it:

  • Boy: "Scrum-diddly-umptions" bar? How does he do it?
  • Bill: My dear boy [sped up] Do you ask a fish how it swims? Or a bird how it flies? [normal pitch] Nosiree, you don't. They do it because they were born to do it. Just like Willy Wonka was born to be a candyman, and you look like you were born to be a Wonkerer!"
  • Off-screen Man: Shut up!

With several short audio dubs (including "It's a bomb! Duck and cover!" when Bill throws the marshmallows), the sequence leads into the poor Charlie Bucket gazing into the store. A man appears and says, "Nobody ever goes in...and nobody ever goes out." An off-screen man is then heard saying, "What are you gonna do, fart?"

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"I feel so good when I hear a fart!"

Suddenly the scene changes constantly and ends up with a clown-like character called Mr. Pockets, who creates a rectangle. The scene then switches to a song about a marching band, which is sung by TV Ted, who sings his famous line "I feel so good when I hear a fart!" Midway through the song, the band plays the 20th Century Fox fanfare, accompanied by shots of the logo.

After several fast-cut shots, the next segment of the poop begins, which is focused around Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, with Grandpa Potts singing "P-O-S-H," and Jeremy and Jemima being bribed by the Child Catcher into free jelly ass, bullshit tarts, and ass cream. The film also features scenes of racing cars and a man who has a dream about the Archangel telling him where to find a Golden Ticket.

Suddenly, the movie "ends" and more random scenes lead to a scene where, in an African-American sketch comedy series "head" unsuccessfully tries to grab a hot date. Then, Max Headroom hacks the video, but is "fast-forwarded" into oblivion. Then, Charlie Bucket finally comes home, an animated man punches himself in the face with a cannonball, and a team of Gumbies perform an operation.

The scene changes to a public domain cartoon short, The Brave Tin Soldier. In the short, a toymaker finishes a set of tin soldiers, but when putting them in the container one "jumps out" apparently on purpose. The Toymaker throws the now one-legged soldier away ("Into the basket the poor tin soldier goes"), and as the clock strikes midnight and he goes to bed, the toys come to life. Suddenly, for no apparent reason, the soldier is arrested.

In the court, the King (who at one time has the voice of Gunnery Sergeant Hartman) questions the Soldier. The Jack-in-the-Box intervenes several times during this scene:

  • King: What is that, Private Pyle?!
  • Soldier: Sir, a jelly doughnut, sir!
  • Jack [popping out]: Objection sustained. [he retreats]
  • King: Well, you little maggot! You make me wanna vomit!
  • Jack [popping out]: Objection overruled. [he retreats]
  • King: Were you born a fat slimy scumbag?!
  • Jack [popping out]: Give 'im a fair trial and then we'll shoot him. [he retreats]

[The DANCER enters]

  • Dancer [singing]: Spare him! / Spare him!
  • King [in a deeper voice]: Bah! Execute him!
  • Judge: Execute him!
  • Other Soldiers: Execute him!
  • Man: On your ASS!

After a brief scene from another public domain cartoon, Jungle Drums and several fast-cut scenes from commercials, etc., we see an old Nissan commercial with cash flowing from the grill, the trunk, the air conditioner, etc., accompanied by Frank Sinatra's Come Fly with Me and, during the intro part of the song, coughing, sneezing, and wheezing noises, followed by an "Ahhhh."

The repeated clips in the poop get a curtain call, Max Headroom appears one last time, and a man asks if there is anything else to say, to which all who appear on-screen reply "No." (There is a man that is dressed like a fairy that says "No;" a man in a hat and suit appears saying, "Bloody fairy.") In yet another repeated clip (this time with audio), the poop ends with a sketch's actors ending it themselves. The sketch consists of two customers (John and Eric) and a waiter:

  • JOHN: This is the silliest sketch I've ever been in!
  • ERIC: Shall we stop it?

[a pause]

  • JOHN: Yeah, all right.

[They all exit. Credits roll.]

  • JERRY SEINFELD: Are we finished?
  • COSMO KRAMER: Done.

[Fade-out.]